Vegas, baby!

When I said to people I was going to Rotorua with my parents I don't think they had any idea of what kind of weekend I had in store.

What better way to start of the weekend by polishing off the $50 bar tab I won at the Carpark bar a few weeks prior, not to mention the Jager shots we won from fortune cookies handed out while there. Chatty Tui was definitely out in full force when it came time to be picked up from the bar by the parents.

After some unsuccessful drunken attempts at taking a photo of the full moon and amazingly not needing a toilet stop before then, we made a much needed wine and dine stop at Matamata’s Workmans café. It has received best café in the country by Café Magazine and upon entering the café was immediately apparent why. The interior has been decorated with an assortment of collections including; fire brush sets, retro humour postcards, 1950’s mirrors, greeting cards, retro wall statues of African women, freestanding ashtrays, transistor radios, matching retro tables and chairs and not forgetting the coffin and sequined up mannequin thrown in for good measure. Singly the collections are all very kitch but as a complete scene it makes for a fun and quirky place that is not what you would expect to find in a small NZ town. To top it off one of the male waiters there was extremely “decorative”, as my parents put it, and was also personality plus. I couldn't help but give him a coy smile and wave before we headed off on our final leg of the trip (oh and the food was great too!).

We awoke bright and early on Saturday morning to find that it was a cracker day outside. Off mountain biking we went. Mum took me inside St Faith’s Church along the way and announced that it was her “favourite church in the world”, which coming from her, is a pretty big statement as she is a fairly seasoned traveler. I could see why though upon walking inside. The church has a very prominent Maori theme with all the woodwork inside being carved into Maori designs and the stained glass windows displaying Maori motifs and New Zealand summer scenes. The stand out feature of the church is the window with an etching of Jesus wearing a Maori cloak and is positioned so that he appears to be walking on the water of Lake Rotorua which is behind the window (symbolizing Jesus walking on the Sea of Galilee). Anyway, that’s more than enough about godly matters.

Our ride began with a 9km cruise around lake Rotorua. As mum said it was “so surreal” riding along pathways through scrub before emerging onto boardwalks that wound their way through sulphurous pools steaming like a hot, grey, stinky soup. The next 10km were spent exploring the mountain bike trails of the Redwood forest – thankfully we didn't come across any dead bodies though. The final 9km was some more cruising back along the lakefront, where we returned to our hostel at Kiwi Paka. Due to my mum being the fitness freak that she is, she decided that 28km of riding wasn't quite enough exercise for the day, meaning a 10km walk through the Redwoods was next on the list.

We had definitely earnt a drink after that effort, and drink we did! A bit of a bar hop ensued before heading home to the bar at Kiwi Paka for a night cap. Somehow I was suddenly downing a Rotorua version of the Jager bomb (lift + Jagermeister, not as bad as it sounds I must say!) and having my photo taken with the people who’d supplied me with the drink. The guy who had given me the drink didn't take to well to me asking him why a local would want to hang out in a youth hostel though so I escaped to hang with my parents.

I was pleased I made the escape as I sat down in time to witness one particular young fellow put on a great show for us. He was sitting in the corner of the bar by himself and proceeded to make heart pumping movements, stroking his forearms and making his arms do the "snake". This was just a few of his wide range of extremely entertaining hand and arm gestures that he performed (all while seated) in what was possibly his own sort of interpretive hip hop dance? Luckily he was so caught up in practising his "moves" he was completely oblivious to Mum and myself in hysterics.

I don’t even know where to begin with Sunday except to say that it was one of the hardest days physically that I have had in a long time. It was up there with doing the Tongariro crossing (9 hours of scaling a mountain side). I must say though that the scenery was magnificent, riding through native bush alongside the blue and green lakes is a pretty amazing experience. It was just a shame that I was so focused on being able to breathe and having enough energy to make it up the next hill that I didn't take as much of it in as I would have liked. 34km along a tar sealed road isn't very much but 34km of up, down, up, down along mountain bike tracks is another story. Some of the ups were so uppy that it was physically impossible to make it up without having to get off and push and some of the downs so steep that I had to squeeze both my front and back brakes for dear life so as to prevent myself from becoming another Redwoods casualty. Aside from the moments where I was fight back tears of exhaustion and was screaming “FUCK YOU mum and dad for doing this to me” in my head over and over again, it was actually an amazing ride that, without a doubt, included some of the best tracks I've ridden on to date.

So that was it. 62km of riding, 10km of walking, eating delicious food and drinking delicious wine about sums up how my weekend away in Rotovegas with my parents was spent. There was plenty of laughs had, mostly at my nutty mother (not forgetting hip hop boy though) and maybe one sneaky tear of exhaustion, which I would never concede to mum and dad of course!

Good times with the olds... Not many can say that now can they.